17th Sunday Year B (Gospel: John 6:1-15) Juares, Mexico and the multiplication of food

 

Juares, Mexico

The world we live in makes it very easy to be cynical and skeptical. There are explanations for so many things, and people are quick to dismiss what cannot be proven. The miracle of the multiplication of loaves and fish is one miracle that I have often heard explained away too. Today I would like to tell you about a similar miracle which happened quite recently.

 

The city of Juares, in Mexico, just across the border from El Paso, is currently considered one of the most dangerous cities in the world, with constant killings because of the drug wars. In 1972 a priest by the name of Fr. Rick Thomas and a religious sister Maria Virginia, were the instruments of an amazing miracle there.

 

In 1964 Fr Richard Thomas, a Jesuit, had been appointed to El Paso, in Texas. In 1970 he was profoundly touched by God and started charismatic prayer meetings in the parish. Sr. Maria Virginia, DC, was also an inspired leader. During one prayer meeting in 1972 they read the passage in Luke 14:12-14 which says,

When you give a lunch or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relations, or rich neighbors, in case they invite you back and so repay you. When you have a party, invite the poor… for they have no means to repay you and so you will be repaid when the upright rise again.

 

The prayer group decided that on Christmas day that year, 1972, they would provide a Christmas lunch to the poor who lived and worked in the dump in Juárez. The poor people in the dump used to separate the trash into various types, cans, bottles, cardboard, etc and then sell it to a co-op which would in turn sell it on. They lived in the dump and worked 7 days a week for $5. The prayer group prepared food for 125 people on Christmas Day. When they got to the dump Fr Richard and the group discovered that they had two labor unions, or trade unions. One union could not go into the other’s area. Eventually Fr Richard got them to come together in one area for the food. Three hundred and fifty people turned up, almost 3 times as many people as they were prepared for. So, Fr Richard explained that there was not enough food for everyone, but they would share what they had. After they distributed it, all 350 people had enough food; the dump people also took some food home and then came back for more, again and again. Afterwards, there was still food left over, so much so, that they took the leftovers to three orphanages.

 

City dump, Juares

According to Father Richard, he and those who were there have encountered the inexplicable multiplication of food on dozens of occasions — right up to today; at times aware of what was happening, in other cases noticing the miracle when they counted up items afterwards. In another example 350 cans of milk were brought to the poor, but every one of the 500 people who came, actually got one. Sacks of flour have produced flour as if from an endless supply, to the astonishment of those handing it out. They have even taken measurements of what was removed and it simply doesn’t add up.

 

On another occasion Fr. Rick and the others who worked with him, were praying and they felt that the Lord was telling them to go to one of the prisons with food for Christmas day. So they decided they would and after getting permission they brought what they thought would be enough food, but in fact they were seriously short. However, they just began cutting up the food and distributing it and the food began to multiply, although they didn’t realise it for a while. They ended up having enough to feed all the prisoners and all the staff as well. There is a video of this available called ‘Viva Christo Re.’  Fr. Rick Thomas died in 2006.

 

One of the reasons I want to tell you about these miracles is to help you to believe that this miracle of the loaves and fish, which we have just heard about, was real. I have sometimes heard it being explained away and people saying that in fact all that happened was that people were so embarrassed when they saw the little boy giving his food, that they produced their own food. It is sad when people rationalise the miracles of Jesus, as though nothing really extraordinary happened. If nothing extraordinary happened the accounts of them wouldn’t have survived 2000 years.  These miracles were real and they have been passed on to us to help us to believe and to understand what the teaching of Jesus is all about.

 

What is even more important than the miracles themselves is what they point to. In John’s Gospel the miracles are continually referred to as ‘signs’.  After the wedding at Cana in St. John’s Gospel, it says, Jesus did this as the beginning of his signs… and his disciples began to believe in him’ (Jn 2:11). All the miracles were pointing to who Jesus was, that He is the Son of God and to help those with him (and us) to believe in his teaching. His teaching is about the reality of God and the afterlife; that God is interested in us in a very personal way; and that God is very much with us. These are not just pious stories, but events that really happened, so that we might believe.

 

Mexico City

When you think of a place like Mexico and the dire poverty there, a kind of poverty that we don’t have here, wouldn’t it make more sense if the Lord worked a miracle of giving all these people work, or a better way of life? But instead the Lord gave them this miracle, this sign of his presence among them. It was a way of saying that ‘I am here among you and concerned for you.’ This gave them hope and courage and faith. Spiritual nourishment is far more important than material help, although that shouldn’t be neglected either. Apparently after the miracle of food in the prison, the whole place was completely transformed, staff and prisoners. They witnessed the supernatural and it gave them hope and a new purpose in their life. This hope is much more important than just our physical needs being met, because hope gives us the strength to endure, especially in hard times. To know that God is with us, not just in a general kind of way, but in a very intimate way, makes all the difference and gives us an interior strength for living.

 

It is very tempting to focus solely on the material needs of people. ‘We will eliminate poverty forever!’ You hear this said every so often, but actually we won’t. Jesus himself said that the poor would always be with us (Mk 14:7). People come to us all the time looking for material support, partly because they confuse us with St. Vincent de Paul society, but we try and help as many as we can. Whatever help we can give people is always short term, but what is more important is the fact that someone was willing to help them. I have had people burst into tears when we agreed to help them, simply because they were so desperate, but they also recognise it as God helping them in their need and that is far more important than the material help itself.

 

If material wealth was what we needed more than anything, then the wealthier countries should be the happiest countries, but they are not. If fact you find more anger, hatred and despair here, than in the poorest countries.

 

Recently I was watching a video about a place called Haulover Inlet, north of Miami. It’s a very dangerous inlet to manoeuvre and they show the different boats going in and out trying to handle the currents. In this video they showed two men in very expensive boats, cursing at each other, full of hatred and rage, because one had cut the other off. I was thinking, if this is where your million dollar boat has got you, it is a sad sight. Another man was cursing at the camera man simply because he was taking the video. These people had great wealth, but were full of anger and hatred.

 

The miracles of Jesus are meant to help us in the same way; to encourage us, to give us hope and to remind us that Jesus is with us, aware of all our needs and constantly  looking after us. Our prayers may not always be answered in the way we would like them to be, but it is more important to know that the Lord is with us.

 

‘When the people saw the sign he had done, they said, “This is truly the prophet who was to come into the world.”’

 

16th Sunday Yr B (Gospel: Mark 6:30-34)) The Lord provides

 

St. Patrick's College Seminary, Maynooth (1795)

Every so often I come across someone who is very critical of Maynooth seminary—where I studied to be a priest—and how awful it is, etc. This is usually from things they have heard about it, as opposed to direct experience. Just before I began my studies there I had heard a lot of bad press as well. However, what I found there was something quite different. Essentially Maynooth offered us a pretty good formation, or training, but all they could do was offer it. It was completely up to us whether we took it on board or not. Needless to mention it was far from perfect and there were plenty of problems there too, but that is normal. However, the staff there were continually reminding us that our formation (or training) as priests was basically in our own hands. They could not force us to comply with what they taught and if we decided to just have a great time while we were there, there was not a lot they could do about it. A few guys did have a great time and didn’t take their time there seriously, but inevitably they were the ones who hit a major crisis either just before or just after they were ordained.

While most of us are not going to be in a seminary, but just getting on with our lives wherever we find ourselves, the same holds true for our spiritual life. If I want to grow as a Christian it is essentially in my own hands. God offers us everything we need and more, but it is up to us whether we make use of it or not. It is the Lord himself who guides us, and that’s what today’s readings are all about. Even if the shepherds He sends don’t do their job properly, the Lord is saying that He himself will look after us, and He does, sometimes in extraordinary ways, to remind us of how real He is and how much He is present to us, but mostly in less dramatic ways.

I’d like to share two stories with you, which both show the extraordinary lengths that Jesus will go to, to help us.

The first story is about a priest who was working in Ottawa, Canada. This priest, Fr. John, had great devotion to the Divine Mercy, as revealed by God to St. Faustina Kowalska in Poland. One evening while at prayer he heard an interior voice telling him that he was to get up and go to Krakow, in Poland. The voice was so strong, he knew it was coming from God and he knew he had to do it, although this made no sense to him. He called a couple of friends and told them what had happened and that he was about to get on a plane to Krakow. They asked him what he was going to do there and he said he had no idea. Needless to mention they thought he was nuts. But this prompting was so strong that he knew he had to do this and so he got a ticket and flew across the Atlantic to Krakow. When he arrived he didn’t know where to go, so he decided to go and visit the shrine of the Divine Mercy. When he arrived at the shrine he spent some time in prayer. While he was praying the Divine Office, which all priests pray, he heard a commotion outside the door. He went outside to see a girl on the steps of the church with her parents. She was screaming. As soon as she saw Fr. John she began cursing at him in English and telling him to go away, she hated him and hated God, etc. She was possessed. So Fr. John went off to his hotel and got his holy oils and came back and prayed with her. He wasn’t allowed to do a formal exorcism, because you need special permission to do that, but he commanded the spirit to leave and blessed her with the holy oil. The girl screamed, but then the spirit seemed to leave and she became peaceful.

The next day when he was at his hotel, he got a message to say that some people outside wanted to see him. When he came down he met the same couple and the young girl. They had brought an interpreter. They explained to him that they lived several hundred miles from Krakow. But the day before, the girl had suddenly got an overwhelming urge to go to Krakow. She went in and woke her parents and told them she had to go to Krakow. They were asleep and told her to go back to bed; besides, Krakow was hundreds of miles away. But the girl kept insisting and insisting and eventually the parents agreed and set out for Krakow. They explained that the girl had become interested in witchcraft and magic, from watching Harry Potter. Eventually she started looking up how to practice magic and work spells, etc. In the end she had become possessed. They also realized that the time when she got this urge to go to Krakow was the same time that Fr. John had heard this inner voice to go to Krakow.

Now wouldn’t you imagine that the Lord might have gotten a priest that was already in Krakow, instead of bringing this priest all the way from Canada? But the Lord was showing them something and is showing us something, that is, the lengths He will go to in order to help us. He is constantly with us, constantly guiding us and will continue to do so until we get to heaven.

 

The other story is an experience I had myself.

When I was working as a hospital chaplain, I was told about a man who had been brought in, who had taken a dose of poison, a weed-killer. They told me that he was going to die, there was nothing they could do for him. The nurse also told me that he probably would not want to see me, as he had already turned away two other priests. On hearing that I knew the Lord was telling me that that was exactly where I had to go.

When God shows you something, you try and be obedient to it and so I dutifully went to his room, not looking forward to probably getting a hostile reception. When I got to his room the door was open and he was there with his adult son. From the door I just said, ‘I heard what happened and I’m sorry.’ And then out of my mouth came the words, ‘Do you regret it?’ and he said, ‘Yes.’ When he said yes, the Lord said to me, as clear as day, ‘That is a confession. Don’t ask for one.’ It was so strong, I knew it was the Lord speaking to me. I asked if I could come in and talk to him. Very definitely he said, ‘I don’t want confession.’ I said that was fine. His son reluctantly left me to talk to him. He was still quite guarded against me, but he told me what had happened. He was a farmer. For whatever reason, on the spur of the moment he took a drink of this deadly poison, a weed-killer, intending to take his own life. Now he had the sad reality of dying slowly and painfully and also having to face his family. I asked him if he would like me to give him the sacrament of the sick (also known as the Anointing of the Sick, and Last Rites). He said again, ‘I don’t want to go to confession,’ and I repeated that he didn’t have to. So I prayed with him and gave him the sacrament of the sick and then I left. I never saw him again.

Several weeks later a friend of mine was telling me about this man she knew who had taken a dose of poison, but then regretted it. She said that as he was dying apparently he refused to see two priests who came to him, but later another priest went to him and he made his peace with God and died peacefully. She didn’t realize I was the priest and it was wonderful for me to hear how I had been instrumental in helping that man make his peace with God before he died. It is another example of the lengths God goes to, to help us. He sent three priests to this man.

Most of how God guides us is much less dramatic. But what Jesus is showing us is that He is present to us all the time and only wants us to reach this happiness which He has created us for. The Lord gives us several very powerful ways to guide, strengthen and protect us on this journey, but just as with the training in the seminary, all He can do is offer it to us. What help am I talking about?

Firstly, through the sacred Scriptures, the Bible, which we listen to at every mass. Do you ever wish God would speak to you? He does speak to us, all the time, so much so that He gave us a whole book of what He has to say to us, to guide and instruct us. Read it, every day, even if it is only for 10 minutes. You’ll be amazed at how much God has to say to you. Think of all the other information we take in each day, through all kinds of media, advertising, internet, television. What could possibly be more important than what God has to say?

Secondly, the Lord teaches us through his Church. The teachings of the Church are his teachings and not just the teaching of a group of people. That is why we continue to try and live it and take it seriously, because it is what God himself is teaching us, given initially to the Apostles by Jesus and passed on through the centuries through their successors. As time passes the teachings of our faith do not change, but we are all the time gaining a deeper understanding of what they mean. Jesus said to the Apostles, ‘I have much more to say to you, more than you can bare now. However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. (Jn 15:12-13).  

Above all He gives us his own body and blood in the Eucharist, so that we can be intimately united to him in the most extraordinary way. The Eucharist really and truly is Jesus, not just a symbol, or some kind of special holy bread. He continually reminds us of this through all the different Eucharistic Miracles, almost 200 officially recognized miracles so far. He wants us to know that He is with us every step of the way in every situation. He is never not there. What more could we possibly ask for than Jesus himself and yet so often we just think of these things as just ‘religious things’, but not really a part of our day-to-day path. On the contrary, they are the exact things that we need for our day-to-day path and they reach into every aspect of our life.

He also gives us the beautiful healing of confession. The Lord knows how much we struggle with sin, which is why He has also given us confession to heal us, give us courage and the strength to get up and continue the journey.

We have been given all the help we could ask for and more. We don’t need something new. What we need is to see what we already have and use it. Just like in the seminary, all we needed was offered to us, but it was up to us to make use of it or not.

 “The remnant of my flock I myself will gather from all the countries where I have dispersed them and will bring them back to their pastures.” (Jeremiah 23:3)

 

 

15th Sunday (Gospel: Mark 6:7-13) Angels and Demons

 

 

Today I would like to talk about something you don’t often hear about and which is often not taken seriously, that is angels and demons. How do we know if angels are real and how can we know anything about them?

 

There are 373 references to angels in Scripture including several times when Jesus mentioned them. In the New Testament there are 180 references to angels. Referring to children, Jesus said, ‘See that you do not despise one of these little [children], for I tell you their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven’ (Mat 18:10). In the Garden of Gethsemane Jesus tells Peter to put away his sword and He says, ‘Do you think I cannot call on my Father and He will at once put at my disposal twelve legions of angels?’ (Mat 26:53). Referring to the second coming of Christ in glory, Jesus said, ‘When the Son of Man comes in his glory and all the angels with him, He will sit on his glorious throne’ (Mat 25:31).

 

When people say they don’t believe in the devil or angels, I always say, ‘So you think Jesus was lying?’

 

We also know about them from what has been revealed to the saints down through the ages and from what exorcists have learned from their ministry of casting out demons, who are the fallen spirits. Casting out demons was one of Jesus’ commands to the Apostles and it is mentioned in today’s Gospel: ‘The twelve drove out many demon and they anointed with oil many who were sick and cured them.’ Jesus commanded the Apostles, ‘Heal the sick, raise the dead…cast out demons.’ (Mat 10:8)

 

The word angel means a messenger. The angels are pure spirits created before the material universe and created primarily to worship and give glory to God, as are we. Because they are pure spirits, they don’t have a bodily form, although they can take on bodily form for different purposes. If they appear to humans, they take on a form so that we can recognize them. Artist’s impressions often show them with wings and I suppose that is to remind us that they can move/fly, but they can appear in any form. They are also outside of time and space, but they can appear to us in the world, when they have been given a particular task by God.

 

They are pure intellect and will, far superior to humans. They do not have emotions. They can influence our dreams. They can affect our moods. They do not know what we are thinking, but they can guess from our body language. They do not know the future.

 

Intellectually they are far superior to us and also far more powerful than us. Anything they have knowledge of, they have total knowledge of. The knowledge they have is instant and complete. It is not like us when we have to learn about a subject gradually, although they are limited in knowledge too. Not all angels have the same knowledge. The higher ranks of angels have greater knowledge than the lower ones.

 

The Choirs (Eph 1:21; Col 1:16)

All of God’s creation has an order to it and the same goes for the angels. There are nine choirs, or orders of angels, which are divided into three hierarchies. When we say choirs of angels, you might just think of groups of angels singing, but that is not what it means. It means groups, orders, or ranks.

 

The first Hierarchy are the Seraphim, the Cherubim and the Thrones, which are closest to God. The first hierarch, or rank, extends immediately to the service of God, so they are never sent to do any exterior ministry. If they perform any kind of activity in relation to those external to themselves, they do it through the mediation of lower angels.

 

The Seraphim, which means ‘burning ones,’ are closest to God and have been given a greater degree of love than any other angel. Their primary task is to love God. They purify others by enlightening them and setting them on fire with love. Their illumination of others is to draw them closer to God, to give them a greater love for God.

 

The Cherubim have been given the greatest degree of knowledge and wisdom of God. Their name means ‘fullness of knowledge.’ They are mentioned as guarding the entrance to the Garden of Eden after the Fall.

 

The Thrones have knowledge of God’s will, mercy and love, which they pass on to the lower ranks of angels to be carried out. They are aware of the weakness of humans because of the Fall and they show God’s mercy.

 

The second Hierarchy are the Dominations, Virtues and Powers and their role is to do with governing. These have to do with the governance of what is below them.

 

The Dominations are given knowledge from the higher angels of what is to be done and they are the ones who actually give the orders of what is to carry out God’s plans. The name indicates a participation in God’s power of governing. They pass on God’s orders, so to say and they are never disobeyed by those below them.

 

The Virtues give the power to execute the orders of the Dominations. Their name implies a certain strength and courage.

 

The Powers are to ensure how the orders are to be carried out according to God’s providence and that it is not interfered with, or distorted in any way. They are also to protect against evil interference, so they are said to ward off evil spirits.

 

The third Hierarchy are the Principalities, Archangels and Angels. This group are about bringing about the actual orders that have been given by God through the higher angels. They interact with humans.

 

The Principalities are the ones who are in charge of earthly nations and kingdoms. Their role is to guide leaders of nations, according to God’s will.

 

The Archangels are the ones who bring messages of great importance, as opposed to angels in general who bring less important messages or instructions to humans. The Archangels Gabriel announces to Mary that she would become the mother of Jesus. The only names of Archangels that we know of are St. Michael, whose name means, ‘Who is like God,’ St. Gabriel, which means, ‘Strength of God’ St. Raphael, which means, ‘Healing of God.’

 

The Angels who have been appointed to guide us, we call guardian angels. Their task is to guide us to salvation and protect us from the attacks of the demons. They will do everything to help us, but they can’t force us.

 

Apparently the priest and mystic Padre Pio (St. Pius of Pietrelcina) was able to see his guardian angel all the time and he only realized after a few years that other people couldn’t see theirs.

 

The Fall

When they were created, all the angels were each given a task or duty and God gave them the grace to carry out that task, which would bring them closer to God and enable them to see God. However, some of them rejected that task. They didn’t want to do it by God’s grace, but by their own power. So they rejected God. In rejecting God they had total knowledge of what they were doing and what the consequences would be. There is no sense of them not realizing some aspect of that decision. The only regret they have is that they didn’t obtain what God was offering them, through the task they were given. They also regret the suffering that it has now caused them, but if they had the choice to do it again, they would make the same choice, because they had total knowledge of what they were doing. So if you feel sometimes that they should be given a second chance, it wouldn’t make any difference. They would do the same thing again.

 

It is believed that Satan was either an archangel or more likely a Seraph, the closest to God and the most powerful. The name Lucifer, means ‘Light-Bearer.’

 

The demons have rejected all good and separated themselves completely from God, which means that they are pure evil and only want to bring about evil, especially against us. They are far more powerful than we are, but through grace we can ascend higher than they can and they envy and hate that and so they try to lead us away from God. Demons cannot affect the will, but they can affect the imagination and body.

 

Sometimes God allows possession or demonic influence for our sanctification. Temptations in particular areas help us to recognize our weakness and give us the opportunity to work to grow in virtue in that area.

 

Ascending higher

One big difference between humans and angels is that angels cannot ascend to a higher level. They will always be what they are. Humans can ascend through grace and we have a life-time to continually obtain grace and move to a higher place in heaven. Our Lady, the only perfect human being and more filled with grace than anyone, is more powerful than any of the angels, which is one reason that the demons are terrified of her and hate her because she is a human being.

 

In every mass Jesus becomes present in the Eucharist, which means that in every mass the church is also filled with angels who continually worship God. I think we will be amazed when we die when we see what actually happens in each mass.

 

Padre Pio of Pietrelcina

Just before we get to the Holy, Holy, at the end of the Preface in the mass, we always say these or similar words:

Through him the Angels praise your majesty,

Dominions adore and Powers tremble before you.

Heaven and the Virtues of heaven and the blessed Seraphim worship together…’ (Preface 1 of Blessed Virgin Mary).

‘And so with Angels and Archangels, with Thrones and Dominions and all the hosts and Powers of heaven, we sing the hymn of your glory…’ (Preface of the Apostles)

 

Raphael’s guidance to Tobit and Tobias.

I just want to finish with part of the Archangel Raphael’s guidance to Tobit and Tobias. In the book of Tobit Raphael is sent to heal Tobit and to guide his son Tobias to his future wife and heal her. Raphael has appeared to them as a man and they don’t realize he is an angel until the very end when he reveals that he was sent by God. Here is part of what he says to them before he ascends to heaven:

 

"Praise God and tell all the living beings about the good things he has done for you, praising and singing to his name. Make God’s words known in an honorable way to everyone and don’t fail to acknowledge him. It is good to hide a king’s secret from view and good to reveal God’s works and bear witness to them with due respect.

 

Do what is good and evil won’t overtake you. Prayer with fasting is good and so is giving to the poor with righteousness… Giving to the poor saves from death and it washes away every sin.

Now praise the Lord here on earth and acknowledge God." (Tob 12: 6-8, 9, 20)

 

 

 God promises his guidance to the Israelites

"I am going to send an angel in front of you, to guard you on the way and to bring you to the place that I have prepared. Be attentive to him and listen to his voice; do not rebel against him, for he will not pardon your transgression; for my name is in him." (Ex 23:20).

 

14th Sunday Year B (Gospel: Mark 6:1-6) The thorn in the flesh.

 

 A few years back I was talking to a man who was telling me about himself. He said that most things in his life were fine, except for one thing. He had a terrible temper, which was so frustrating and humiliating and he said, ‘If only I didn’t have this temper, I’d be perfect.’ I couldn’t help thinking that this weakness which was so frustrating for him, was probably also one of the things that helped him to stay close to God. If we thought we were perfect we would probably also think that we had little or no need for God. It is also true that when we are not aware of our weaknesses that we can become terribly arrogant.

 

There is a priest known simply as Brother Andrew, who co-founded the Brothers part of the Missionaries of Charity with St. Teresa. In one of his books about his experiences, he begins by saying: ‘Few people would believe the weakness on which the Missionaries of Charity are built.’ He writes a lot about his own weakness, although he doesn’t say exactly what it was, but that he suffered from some kind of addiction. But this weakness, which frustrated him so much, was also one of the things that made him holy. He doesn’t say that, but you can see it from his writings. The reason why God did such great work through him, through St. Teresa and through so many others, was not because they were extraordinarily talented, but because they totally relied on God for everything. The reason they totally relied on God was because they came to see that without him they are nothing.

 

In St. John’s Gospel Jesus says, ‘I am the vine you are the branches… cut off from me, you can do nothing.’ (Jn 15:5).

 

The path to growing closer to God involves us becoming more and more aware of what we are like at the deepest level. Humility is not pretending that you are not good when you know you are, but seeing ourselves as we really are. It is easy to get a false impression of what a holy person is. Books can often give us the impression that the saints were people who did almost no wrong and just floated along loving God. The truth is that the saints are weak people, with just as many weaknesses as any of us, but they continually turned to God for help and as a result God was able to work through them in such an amazing way. To understand that is key to growing in the spiritual life. If the saints were perfect people who never did any wrong, then few of us could relate to them. But if they were weak people just like any of us—which they were—then not only can we relate to them, but it can help us to see that the exact same path is open to us. It doesn’t depend on us being good enough, rather it depends on us continually turning to God. That is the key.

 

When Sr. Briege McKenna—who gave us a mission here a few years ago—was a young nun, she was about to go for training in theology, but the Lord clearly told her not to. He then showed her that she had a particular ministry to priests, so she began her ministry to priests. The first time she was to share in giving a retreat with another Jesuit priest, the priest called her on the morning of the retreat and told her that he was sick and so she would have to go on without him. She said she was a nervous wreck. Here she was about to give a retreat to priests, all of whom had theological training and she had none. She knew she would have to totally depend on God and that is exactly what God wanted her to do. You can imagine how humbling it was talking to a room full of priests, when she was so young. She said that one elderly priest said to her, ‘What could you possibly have to tell us?’ The Lord deliberately allowed this to happen, so that she would learn to completely depend on him.

 

There is no one here who doesn’t have weaknesses of one kind or another. It could be some kind of addiction, it could be a need to control, an emotional dependency, whatever. We all have something and as you well know, it can be extremely frustrating. Our thinking is usually, ‘How can I possibly pleasing to God when I struggle this way?’ God could take away these things, but He doesn’t, because in a paradoxical way, they help us come closer to God. When we are aware of our own sinfulness, we are also aware of how much we need God’s mercy and that’s how it should be.

 

I find it comforting that two thousand years ago, St. Paul writes about the exact same thing (2 Cor 12:7-10). Paul was a very intelligent man, well educated and obviously very talented and even though he had a vision of Jesus which converted him and many more visions after, he too suffered from some kind of weakness, although he doesn’t say what it was. In this second reading you can hear his frustration:

 

…‘because of these surpassingly great revelations. Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me, but He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”’ (2 Cor 12:7-9)

You can imagine how full of pride he could have become, since he had received all these visions from God and because the Lord was continually working extraordinary miracles through him. Whatever weakness it was, it kept him humble, which meant that he continually needed to turn to the Lord and ask for his help and that is why he and so many other men and women were such powerful instruments in God’s hands, because they came to rely totally on God and not on themselves.

 

In Romans 7:15 he writes:

‘I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.’ You wouldn’t believe how many times I have heard people say that in confession, word for word.

 

I have no doubt that all of us probably feel we would be more pleasing to God if we could overcome our weaknesses. But perhaps these readings will help us to see that the Lord knows what He is doing when He allows us to struggle with them. They are frustrating yes, but they can also be a gift in the sense that they make us rely on the power of God more than on ourselves. It also reminds us that it is not a question of being ‘good enough’ for God. We will never be good enough by our own strength, but that doesn’t matter. It is God himself who makes up the difference.

‘So I shall be very happy to make my weaknesses my special boast so that the power of Christ may stay over me.’ (2 Cor 12:9)